Like a flower waiting to bloom. Like a light bulb in a dark room, I’m just sittin’ here waiting for you to come on home and turn me on.

Have you ever found your self falling for- or at the very least crushing on someone who’s ‘sexuality’ (let’s put it that way. It’s a lot easier) is in question? Not that Norah Jone’s song is intended for this kind of feeling, uh-uh!

I have found my self many times I could hardly count, looking at someone wondering how come they chose to be that way when they can make girls scream and giggle? I mean, not that am questioning their chosen kind of life.

I have guy friends who act more girly than I do and always I ask them if they ever wanted to get marry someone from the opposite sex. Some would answer me “never” waiving their hands like Sharpay. Some would just shrug either they don’t want to be sure or they aren’t that sure. While some would surprisingly tell me, they do and they plan to have their own kids too. In fact, one of them told me, he maybe have relationships with boys or even bisexuals at the moment but he surely wants to have a wife whom he will go home to everyday in the future. And I’d wonder how’d life be having a husband who has the same taste with guys as you? How would a relationship go with someone who loves to bring your shoulder bag not because he does not want you to be loaded with stuff while you’re together? Or how would it be like when you’re out and some one just passed by and his eyes quickly detach from your’s following some tall, dark and sexy guy? Or worse, how painful it’ll be to see him flirting with a guy and doing it in front of you?

All of these questions remain as questions. I haven’t been into either of those kinds of situation. Although, I am not gonna lie. I have had crushes before who’s gender preferences are somewhat questionable. But it was not an issue to me, not even giggling over the same cutie. They are good looking and girls go run after them screaming some are even crying begging them to change their minds and stop liking guys. Okay, that is exaggerating. They don’t do it literally. At least a quarter of them. Hahaha!

I have gay and bisexual friends who told me that whenever a girl likes them more than a friend, they too (unlike some heterosexuals, jeez!) felt special, good looking or just privileged to be liked by a girl despite of their sexuality. They may tell you “eww!” or may roll their eyes, but these are just a few signs that they’re touched by the treatment or feelings you have for them. It’s like realizing, it’s not indeed the end of the world. That despite of their chosen ‘gender’ – being in the middle, there will still be that someone who will accept them for who they are. Which sometimes lead to you-know-where… down the isle! Sounds like a sweet love story yet to be told, neh? Yes. It is. I know some people specially those whom I have met as a grow older, they chose to marry a woman because women are women. No matter how imperfect you are they will always accept you for who you are. Am not saying that men don’t, but it’s different- always different with a woman’s case.

I’ve seen three if my counting is right, unusual marriages in my twenty three years of living. And all of them are happy with three to six kids. The children of course have to endure bullying at school. I have a friend in elementary who’s father is a gay. My birthplace is a small town and people really know who’s who and what’s hot. My friend was bullied at school. Kids would call her Daddy a gay and laugh at her for being a gay’s daughter. People would ask her jokingly but intentionally hurting her (I guess), how it feels like of having two mothers without a father. Or asking her about the gossips about her Dad taking home some guys at night. As a kid of course it was not easy for her, nor to her parents. But voila! She survived. Their family survived. Her parents are growing old together there’s no stopping. And soon, her Daddy will be a grandfather!

Books, movies and some other stories- be it fiction or non-fiction, may tell us that this kind of relationship may not last long. Yet, I sometimes find my self attracted or crushing on a gay or a bisexual, and I would wonder how would it feel to have someone who will understand how to be a girl, just because they have the heart of a girl.   ***

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