1. I should have learned how to play an instrument.
As a daughter of a musically inclined family, I was expected to have a talent in singing and dancing. People may not have directly told me I should also be able to play an instrument but I felt like I was expected to. My grandfather and father both know how to play a guitar. My mother and her sisters too were taught how to play the same instrument. The same grandfather knows how to play piano, saxophone and flute. He even encouraged me to learn flute but I found it very difficult so I refused. I think it used to be just an envy that I started to ask my friends to teach me how to play the guitar. I’ve learned the easier chords but gave up learning more because my fingers are short and I find it really hard to learn guitars. Now that I am in my mid-twenties and is very in love with music, I wish I had the patience to learn at least one instrument when I was younger.

2. I should have followed proper etiquette to behave like a girl consistently.
My mother is very particular with our behavior specially that it took her four daughters before she got a son. She and my grandmother were very strict with hair length, clothes and proper etiquette. At home we were taught how we should sit, eat and stand specially during our adolescent years. But you know how hard-headed kids behave; they don’t follow rules at all times. As the saying goes: “When the cat is out, the mouse play around.” When I was in grade school , I always wear shorts under my skirt because I didn’t feel comfortable with skirts alone. During school events though, I have no choice but to wear skirts and dresses without the shorts under them. Actually, until now I still have some boyish behavior that I have been accustomed to. Like, the way I would sit down. Sometimes, I tend to forget that I am wearing a skirt or a dress and sit like a boy: legs apart or the so-called “numero quatro“. Whenever I stand up, I tend to stand up with legs apart folded arms and lazy head. But whenever I wear high heeled shoes, I stand like well- an elite girl. 😀
The way I also speak specially “Tagalog” and my mother tongue sounds like a dude. My friends would tease me and call me “Tambay” or “Taong Kalye” most specially when I curse in the dialect. 😀

3. I would have practiced my handwriting.
Somehow, my handwriting matters to me now. When I was still a college student and during my BPO days, my handwriting doesn’t matter because the evolution of technology can make my penmanship more readable and understandable. But now that my career has changed and I always write on the board and required to make come corrections on the paper, I wish I could have taken my time to practice and experiment on my handwriting while I was still studying.

4. I wish I got interested in cooking.
Most of the women in my family can cook and bake very well not only because it’s the custom and tradition but also because my mother’s mother is really good at cooking and baking. They also believe that women should know how to cook… well, there’s an exception. I didn’t have any interest in cooking even when I was a kid. I am such a lazy and impatient kid. My family have encouraged me to try cooking or baking but I would just sit on the table look at them and just help a hand by passing on the egg or the flour. My sister on the other hand is really the opposite of me and she’d learned a lot. Her major in college was even inspired by my family’s interest to food and cooking.
I’ve always hated the process, that’s why. Although I had to learn a few dishes during college because even if I had to stay with one of my aunts, there are those days I had to live by myself. I’ll be working on this item, though I am hoping to meet a man who can cook for me. 😉

5. I could have studied really hard on English.
Admittedly, I only told people my favorite subject was English because Mathematics is up until now very complicated. In grade school, we were taught basic English grammar. In high school, we were taught how to write Literary pieces, while in college, we focused on academic writing. But none of these days I studied really well. The main reason? It’s sometimes the laziness and most of the times the lack of patience. I’ve always wanted instant in everything, specially in writing. Most of the times I wish there is a telepathy between the laptop and my brain so I don’t have to spend some time typing on the keyboard. This is why I don’t know how to write a Haiku, a legit poem, short stories and I’m still struggling with my grammar- not to mention I’m horrible in spelling.

The bottom line is, it’s my personality that didn’t improve over the years and now I’m stuck in the corner wishing for the time to go backwards so I can learn and do all the things I wish I can do now. I always believe that you’re never too old to do the things you want to do but I couldn’t find the time now to learn all of them. I can probably learn how to cook and work on my English but I am not sure about playing an instrument or to behave like a woman all the time.

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