Mirror, mirror on your eyes, how does my future looks like?

Not too long ago, I’ve heard from one of my friends that she met a guy online and shared a romantic relationship with him for a few months. In that short period of time, she was able to imagine her future with a man for the first time. When I first heard it, I thought it was a little impossible until a month ago, I met someone and was able to understand what my friend meant about “looking at your future”.

It might be just my exaggeration of things. I know it may sound a cliche but in all honesty, it felt really different. It’s strange that I have been planning all my life how my future would be and when things should happen and fall into place. But when I set my eyes on this man, everything I have planned seemed to vanished -and it scared me. A little.

It only takes a few moments to make me go gaga over a guy. But with this one, I don’t know how fast things happened. All I remember was when we first said our hello’s, there was a memory from a dream I’ve had in the past but couldn’t remember exactly when and what happened. Out of curiosity, I asked him if he’s married. “No” was his answer and to make things clearer he also emphasized that he hasn’t been married nor in a current relationship. That’s when my heart called 911.

I’ve said this before: “there was nothing”. But if there really was nothing, why did I get too interested with almost everything about him the first time we met? I was probably in a denial stage because I have been refusing to fall in love again after a heart break that not only lasted for 2 years but also have made me vulnerable and desperate but more careful, which took me to where I am now.

It may sound common for most people… call me exaggerating, but whenever our eyes meet I could see my future: my husband, our home and our children.

It is possible to impress someone in a few minutes. However, is it possible to see your future in just a few minutes? Is it possible to fall for someone in a matter of days? Too impossible and too fictitious!

Part of me is grateful that we can no longer see each other because I’m afraid where the situation would take me and I wonder how hard this time I’m going to fall on the ground when that little love story ends. xxx

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